Being the ascribed scribes we arrive early, and snaffled a parking slot outside the Queen and Albert, which as far as we could see had no car park. We spotted Moose the night's Hare running around near the green, and pondered whether this was actually part of the route, or if he was just laying some dummy scent so to speak.
The lack of parking did not deter the pack from assembling, and soon we were gathered for the off, Roger being absent meant this was slightly later than usual. The Hare then proceeded with what was generally agreed to be a more accurate than usual preamble for the Hash, the exact words escape me, but sounded to me like, "Fluff it, let's just do it!" and we were off.
We headed left towards Bourne End, stopping at the first check by a zebra crossing, and causing numerous cars and a fire engine to skid to a halt. It was called straight on, then right into a footpath at the back of some factory buildings. Moose advised us that if we arrived back at this point later on in the evening, the pub would still be back along the road we had just run long (nice to know it wasn't a moving pub!). There were two ways, a long flat way, or a steep slippery hilly way, fortunately no-one took the third straight back to the pub way!
At the top of the hill we stopped for a breather and to admire the view (unfortunately we couldn't quite see Moose's house from there!). Then there was a very long down with lots of on backs to keep Ant busy, and then we were into a housing estate. Somewhere around here we lost the shorts, The Ex-GM and Gerry (retired hurt) and the hare! Fortunately there were neat little blobs of flour to follow, so after the pack wiggling through the houses and along the main road we headed down past the Spade Oak to the river Thames where suddenly (very Mr Benn style) Moose appeared.
Along a few more roads and footpaths then back into the fields where there was much confusion as the majority of hashers in their enthusiasm had taken the lower (and not marked) route of two parallel paths. This caused some consternation for the three hashers on the correct route when meeting a five back. Bryony assured us that the paths would meet up eventually, but after much shouting between groups, the lower group scrambled over a wire fence to bring the pack back together, and in no time at all we were back at the pub.
Here the hash took a turn for awesomeness as tray after tray of sandwiches (egg mayonnaise, tuna, pork & apple, and beef) arrived closely followed by numerous bowls of chips. We chomped away contentedly, as Dave exercised his voice. "Listen Listen this is important!" and handed Matt a well deserved T Shirt for 50 runs, and Sooper an even more deserving one for 500.
Many thanks moose for another great Hash, Alan & Sandra